RealLife Study Outline

“Be True to What God Made You”

Prepared for use during week of February 20^th-26^th , 2007.

Ice Breaker: Which One are You? Give a piece of paper and pencil to every person in the group. Have each person write numbers 1-3 on their paper vertically. Ask multiple choice questions from page 5 of the RealLife Study Outline and read the possible answers. Have each person in the group choose which answer best describes the way they act most of the time, then write their answer by the appropriate corresponding numeral on the paper. Example: 1.a after everyone has completed the test tell them that if they chose letter “a” answers most: they are probably predominantly a sanguine temperament; “b” Choleric; “c” Melancholy or “d” Phlegmatic. If no temperament stood out above the rest, tell them they’re in good company, Jonah was confused, too.

Scripture Text: Read Jonah 1-3 aloud.

Questions:

1. Why did Jonah go to Tarshish?

2. Jonah did not want the Lord to save Ninevah. Why?

3. What happened that inspired Jonah to have a change of heart?

4. Truly, the only one who has a right to judge others, is the one who has never needed forgiveness. Yet, though no such human being exists, we still judge, talk about and sometimes, even condemn others. What do you believe is the most common defense given for judging others?

a. They’ve judged me so I need to return the favor.

b. I know more than them.

c. I know more than God.

d. They’re failing miserably and if I don’t tell them, no one will.

e. God put me on this earth to help him improve others.

f. I’m right, they’re wrong.

g. They are not like me.

h. _______________

5. What does the Lord say about judging others? (Read Matthew 7:1-3)

6. Tim LaHaye, in his book Why You Act the Way You Do, gives the following formula for behavior: Inherited Temperament + Childhood Training + Parental Love + Life’s Experiences + Habit + Education +Self-Discipline + Motivation + Mental Attitude + Health = Your Behavior. What factors in this fomula are determined by God? What factors are out of your control? What factors can you change? (Note: Our god-given temperament is determined by our DNA, just like our eye color and hair color is.)

7. Bishop taught that Jonah was not comfortable in the skin God had given him. He was prophetically gifted and required to speak judgment, but had a gentle heart. Jonah actually made himself miserable trying to act like a “hawk” instead of the “dove” God had created him to be. One of the greatest mistakes people can make is to not understand the temperament God gave them; or worse yet, to try to be someone they are not. Tonight, just for fun and understanding, read the temperament definitions on page 3 & 4 of the RealLife Study Outline. Then, have each person tell which one describes them best and why. Preface it by saying, nearly everyone is a combination of two different temperament types, but have them try to decide which one is predominant.

8. Conclude by reading 1 Cor 12:12-26 from the Amplified Version. (See Page 2 of RealLife Study Outline)

1 Corinthians 12:12-26

For just as the body is a unity and yet has many parts, and all the parts, though many, form [only] one body, so it is with Christ (the Messiah, the Anointed One). 13 For by [means of the personal agency of] one [Holy] Spirit we were all, whether Jews or Greeks, slaves or free, baptized [and by baptism united together] into one body, and all made to drink of one [Holy] Spirit. 14 For the body does not consist of one limb or organ but of many. 15 If the foot should say, Because I am not the hand, I do not belong to the body, would it be therefore not [a part] of the body? 16 If the ear should say, Because I am not the eye, I do not belong to the body, would it be therefore not [a part] of the body? 17 If the whole body were an eye, where [would be the sense of] hearing? If the whole body were an ear, where [would be the sense of] smell? 18 But as it is, God has placed and arranged the limbs and organs in the body, each [particular one] of them, just as He wished and saw fit and with the best adaptation. 19 But if [the whole] were all a single organ, where would the body be? 20 And now there are [certainly] many limbs and organs, but a single body. 21 And the eye is not able to say to the hand, I have no need of you, nor again the head to the feet, I have no need of you. 22 But instead, there is [absolute] necessity for the parts of the body that are considered the more weak. 23 And those [parts] of the body which we consider rather ignoble are [the very parts] which we invest with additional honor, and our unseemly parts and those unsuitable for exposure are treated with seemliness (modesty and decorum), 24 Which our more presentable parts do not require. But God has so adjusted (mingled, harmonized, and subtly proportioned the parts of) the whole body, giving the greater honor and richer endowment to the inferior parts which lack [apparent importance], 25 So that there should be no division or discord or lack of adaptation [of the parts of the body to each other], but the members all alike should have a mutual interest in and care for one another. 26 And if one member suffers, all the parts [share] the suffering; if one member is honored, all the members [share in] the enjoyment of it. AMPLIFIED VERSION

All information below is taken as excerpts from Tim LaHaye’s book Why You Act the Way You Do pp. 26-31, published by Living Books a registered trademark of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc. 1984.

MEET SPARKY SANGUINE

“Sparky Sanguine is a warm, buoyant, lively, and “enjoying” person. Receptive by nature, external impressions easily find their way to his heart, where they cause an outburst of response. Feelings rather than reflective thoughts predominate to form his decisions. Sparky is so outgoing he is usually considered a super-extrovert.

Mr. Sanguine has an unusual capacity for enjoying himself and usually passes on his fun-loving spirit. The moment he enters a room he tends to lift the spirits of everyone present by his exuberant conversation. He is a fascinating storyteller and his warm, emotional nature almost helps you relive the experience as he tells it.

Mr. Sanguine never lacks for friends. He can genuinely feel the joys and sorrows of the person he meets and has the capacity to make him feel important, as though he were a very special friend—and he is, as long as he is looking at you. Then he fixes his eyes with equal intensity on the next person he meets.

The Apostle Peter in the Bible was much like Sparky Sanguine. Every time he appeared in the Gospels he was talking. In fact, I read through the Gospels one time to verify my suspicion and found that Simon Peter talked more than all the other disciples put together. That is typical for Sparky. As my sanguine minister friend Ken Poure says, ‘A sanguine always enters a room mouth first.’ His noisy, blustering, friendly ways make him appear more confident than he really is, but his energy and lovable disposition get him by the rough spots of life. People have a way of excusing his weaknesses by saying, ‘That’s just the way he is.’”

MEET ROCKY CHOLERIC

“Rocky Choleric is hot, quick, active, practical, strong-willed, self-sufficient, and very independent. He tends to be decisive and opinionated, finding it easy to make decisions both for himself and other people. Like Sparky Sanguine, Rocky Choleric is an extrovert, but is not nearly so intense.

Mr. Choleric thrives on activity. He does not need to be stimulated by his environment, but rather stimulates his environment with his endless ideas, plans, goals, and ambitions. He does not engage in aimless ideas, plans, goals, and ambitions. He does not engage in aimless activity, for he has a practical, keen mind, capable of making sound, instant decisions or planning worthwhile projects. He does not vacillate under the pressure of what others think, but takes a definite stand on issues and can often be found crusading against some social injustice or subversive situation. Rocky is not frightened by adversities; in fact, they tend to encourage him. His dogged determination usually allows him to succeed where others have failed.

Mr. Choleric’s emotional nature is the least developed part of his temperament. He does not sympathize easily with others, nor does he naturally show or express compassion. He is often embarrasses or disgusted by the tears of others and is usually insensitive to their needs. He reflects little appreciation for music and the fine arts, unless his secondary temperament traits are those of the melancholy. He invariably seeks utilitarian and productive values in life. Not given to analysis, but rather to quick, almost intuitive appraisal, the choleric tends to look at the goal for which he is working without recognizing the potential pitfalls and obstacles in the path. Once he has started toward his goal, he may run roughshod over individuals who stand in his way. He tends to be domineering and bossy and does not hesitate to use people to accomplish his ends. He is often considered an opportunist.”

MEET MARTIN MELANCHOLY

“Martin Melancholy is the richest of all the temperaments. He is an analytical, self-sacrificing, gifted, perfectionist type with a very sensitive emotional nature. No one gets more enjoyment from the fine arts than the melancholy. By nature, he is prone to be an introvert; but since his feelings predominate, he is given to a variety of moods. Sometimes they will life him to heights of ecstasy that cause him to act more extroverted. However, at other times he will be gloomy and depressed, and during these periods he becomes withdrawn and can be quite antagonistic.

Martin is a very faithful friend, but unlike the sanguine, he does not make friends easily. He seldom pushes himself forward to meet people, but rather lets them come to him. He is perhaps the most dependable of all the temperaments, for his perfectionist and conscientious tendencies do not permit him to be a shirker or let other down when they are counting on him. His reticence to put himself forward is often taken as an indication that he doesn’t enjoy people. Like the rest of us, he not only likes others but has a strong desire to be loved by them but finds it difficult to express his true feelings. Disappointing experiences make him reluctant to take people at face value; thus he is prone to be suspicious when other seek him out or shower him with attention.

His exceptional analytical ability causes him to diagnose accurately the obstacles and dangers of any project he has a part in planning. This is in sharp contrast to the choleric, who rarely anticipates problems or difficulties, but is confident he can cope with whatever crises may arise. Such a characteristic often finds the melancholy reticent to initiate some new project or in conflict with those who wish to do so. Occasionally, in a mood of emotional ecstasy or inspiration, he may produce some great work of art or genius. But these accomplishments are often followed by periods of great depression.

Martin Melancholy usually finds his greatest meaning in life through personal sacrifice. He seems desirous of making himself suffer, and he will often choose a difficult life vocation involving great personal sacrifice. But once it is chosen, he is prone to be very thorough and persistent in his pursuit of it and more than likely will accomplish great good if his natural tendency to gripe throughout the sacrificial process doesn’t get him so depressed that he gives up on it altogether. No temperament has so much natural potential when energized by the Holy Spirit as the melancholy.

MEET PHILIP PHLEGMATIC

“Philip Phlegmatic is the calm, easygoing, never-get-upset individual with such a high boiling point that he almost never becomes angry. He is the easiest type of person to get along with and is by nature the most likeable of all the temperaments.

Philip Phlegmatic derives his name from what Hippocrates thought was the body fluid that produced that “calm, cool, slow, well-balanced temperament.” Life for him is a happy, unexcited, pleasant experience in which he avoids as much involvement as possible. He is so calm and unruffled that he never seems agitated, no matter what circumstances surround him. He is the one temperament type that is consistent every time you see him. Beneath his cool, reticent, almost timid personality, Mr. Phlegmatic has a very capable combination of abilities. He feels more emotion than appears on the surface and appreciates the fine arts and the beautiful things of life. Usually he avoids violence.

The phlegmatic does not lack for friends, because he enjoys people and has a natural dry sense of humor. He is the type of individual who can have a crowd of people “in stitches,” yet never cracks a smile. Possessing the unique capability for seeing something humorous in others and the things they do, he maintains a positive approach to life. He has a good, retentive mind and is capable of being a fine imitator.

Phil Phlegmatic tends to be a spectator in life and tries not to get very involved with the activities of others. In fact, it is usually with great reluctance that he is ever motivated to any form of activity beyond his daily routine. This does not mean, however, that he cannot appreciate the need for action and the predicaments of others. He and Rocky Choleric may confront the same social injustice, but their responses will be entirely different. The crusading spirit of the choleric will cause him to explain, “Let’s get a committee organized and campaign to do something about this!” The phlegmatic would likely respond, “These conditions are terrible! Why doesn’t someone do something about them?” Usually kind-hearted and sympathetic, Phil Phlegmatic seldom conveys his true feelings. When once aroused to action, however, his capable and efficient qualities become apparent. He will not volunteer to leadership on his own, but when it I forced upon him, he proves to be a very capable leader. He has a conciliating effect on others and is a natural peacemaker.

Ice Breaker Questions

1. What best describes your typical eating habits?
1. I love to eat everything in sight and sometimes look it. In a restaurant I enjoy talking so much that I never look at the menu until the waiter comes.
2. I seldom vary my menu from one day to the next. But, when my food arrives, I bolt it down in big chunks, often talking while eating.
3. I’m a picky eater. It takes me a long time to decide what to order, but once it arrives I savor every bite.
4. I’m a deliberate eater and usually the last one done. I rarely gain weight because of my careful eating habits.

2. What best describes your driving style?
1. I’m an erratic driver. Sometimes I “speed”, then for no apparent reason, I may slow down. I enjoy talking to people so much, that I look them in the eyes even when I’m driving.
2. I’m a daring speed demon who darts in and out of traffic constantly trying to get more done in a given period of time than humanly possible.
3. I never leave home without preparing for the trip well in advance. I rarely speed and am the most likely of all temperaments to keep a mileage log in my car.
4. I’m a slow, cautious driver, usually the last one to leave an intersection. I get few tickets and rarely get in accidents.

3. What best describes your shopping style?
1. I don’t like to have to be price conscious, but select for visual satisfaction. I’m drawn by colorful packaging. At the grocery store, my cart is usually overflowing.
2. I’m not particularly fond of shopping. I only go when I need something. But when I do shop, I usually overbuy.
3. I’m a deliberate decisive shopper who compares prices and quality very carefully. I might leave the store a time or two and if it isn’t sold by the time I return, buy it.
4. I enjoy shopping. I’m very frugile. I shop slow and long.